Tuesday 9 May 2017

She finally smiles

She walks around the familiar lines
Step by step
Looking with greater passion
As if it was for the last time 
She walks and stops and walks 
To re imagine each moment spent 
Relive each memory
Those days of fun
And moments of fear
Of building
And destroying 
So crystal clear 
The walls narrate her story to herself 
They witnessed it all after all
They cry because they couldn't comfort her 
In times of chaos and mourn
Those objects she bought in happy times
Stare at her as she walks around
Shining at once with her chirpy sound 
Stood today dusted with deafening silent sound 
She walks and stops and walks around
With a smile on her face
May be these lifeless objects understood her more
Than any cell draining her head 
She takes a deep breath 
And gasps in for air 
Knowing it so different around 
She glimpses the stains of tears 
And the long lost joy profound 

She doesn't care about changing her clothes
Or packing her bags 
Or doing her hair well
This journey she was about to initiate 
Was hopefully better than any heaven or hell

She leaves her bedroom
Walks down to the lobby
Hoping to catch a glimpse of the morning sun
Peeping through the window 
Everything is dark 
But yet she sees light
In the next steps of her 
Bliss 

She knows mommy is annoyed
And dad probably has been silent in pain
She knows that all are worried for her
Its all such a sad stain

She can see people whispering 
But she can finally not hear a word 
Oh thank god 
She whispers to herself
She is finally free from the burden of her nature 

She walks around 
To reach the door 
But stops as she hears her name
Looking around she notices how
He sits somewhere in a corner 
Quiet and straight faced
She closes her eyes 
And looks at herself 
Lying so lifeless on the ground
Beautiful she feels
Smiling inside 
This was the end after all

She talks to him 
But he still cant hear
Its like even this didn't change 
She bids goodbye 
To all the familiar faces
With a smile 

No one will worry about her 
No one will carry the grief 
No one will have to wonder why she is abnormal
Crazy or a severe pain
No one will need to understand her dilemmas
Or try to prioritize her anymore 
She was finally free
Just thinking about herself 
Waiting to get lost 
Away from this world 
Oh so fake. 

- Diary of an Oxymoron